Saturday, May 21, 2005
why am i always so stupid?
i know i shouldntve click on that bloody link.
i know i should not be feeling sad over what happened.
i know i should be crying like siao now.
i know that you may not be talking about me.
but what the fuck.
it feels as though you are.
i hate feeling weak. i promised myself that no matter what happens, i wont cry. not for you. not for me. but why am i feeling like shit now? lols. has it got something to do with it being the 21st? hell. i dont know.
i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know idont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know i dont know
just that i hate hate hate hate hate hate hate hate this bloody fucking feeling.
hais.
blame it on myself. why did i go and fucking click on the link. why why why why why why why why why why why why why why??!!!
i know that it may not be talking about me. but it feels as though you are. so there goes my feelings.. arrgh.. i hate you for putting me through all these bullshit. you hurt me once. twice. [thrice?] but i still put up with it. god knows why. i couldve just walk out on it, after what you've done. i couldve KICKED your BALLS so that you cant reproduce. or maybe i can KICK your BALLS, call the ambulance let you recuperate and KICK you BALLS again.
ok i digressed.
i couldve walked out on everything. but why didnt i? i loved you, and i forgave you. was really happy when you started being more like the guy i once know. then it was the time for you to feel sad. you cant take it. lets face the fact alright? i DIDNT DO anything to hurt you. it was only TALK and no ACTION. whereas yours was BOTH TALK AND ACTION. who should be hurted more?! YOU? or ME?! narcissistic me screams ME!! and the WHOLE WORLD better KNOW IT! i didnt ask for the breakup. you did. dont know why everybody thought that it was ME.
again, i digressed.
hais.
blame it all on me then. im used to it..
sleeping soon.. nites..
